About Our Idiots

We at AsktheIdiots.com scour the world in order to bring the best idiots to answer your burning questions. (Disclaimer: If you actually are burning, you probably should dial 9-1-1 or your other local emergency number and get help instead of waiting for assistance here.) This is a list of our most prolific and popular writers and a little about what makes them the perfect idiot for our website!

John AlCraft

John AlCraft

Mr. Alcraft is one of the world’s top Pantologists. Since childhood he’s devoted his life to knowledge of all kinds and to that end has a Master’s degree in Library Science with an emphasis on Information Systems Development. He also has three Bachelor’s degrees in Anthropology, Sociology, and Interior Design as well as a professional certificate in Mixology. He is sure he knows or can find everything.

Dr. Mr. Brooks

Dr. Mr. Brooks

Dr. Mr. Brooks received his M.D. from the Patrician’s Online Institute of Hygiene and Chirurgery and his license from the island principality of Walkoria in 2012. He and his wife work tirelessly together from their personal office in Morning Woods Estates to develop new procedures and make life better and healthier for everyone. Dr. Mr. Brooks specializes in mainstreaming radical surgical techniques and expanding the reach of radiation therapy.

Dr. Mrs. Brooks

Dr. Mrs. Brooks

Dr. Mrs. Brooks received her M.D. from the Patrician’s Online Institute of Hygiene and Chirurgery and her license from the island principality of Walkoria in 2012. She and her husband work tirelessly together from their personal office in Morning Woods Estates to develop new procedures and make life better and healthier for everyone. Dr. Mrs. Brooks specializes in developing new pharmaceuticals and finding creative uses for existing medications and herbal remedies.

Fitness Bob

Fitness Bob

Fitness Bob’s resume reads like a guide to the top fitness chains in the United States, totaling nearly 100 hours of personal instruction to Hollywood greats and normal health seekers alike. Knowing his ideas were far ahead of those chains’ ideals, he now works from his own equipment in the family home. His busy schedule doesn’t allow much time for his own workouts, but he will take a few moments to pass on his knowledge to you.

Nicola Delbruck, Ph.D.

Nicola Delbruck, Ph.D.

Dr. Delbruck has a Ph.D. in Biogeography with an emphasis on historical phytogeography. Her special skills have made her the “go to scientist” for many news shows and talk programs where she puts her skills in Science — with a capital “S” — to good use no matter the topic of discussion. She is also the author of several books, including the College Buzz Bestseller List topper Plant Barrios in the Middle Pleistocene Epoch and the forthcoming Science Has Some Answers!

Dr. Neil Hasen

Dr. Neil Hasen

Dr. Neil Hasen is one of the pioneers of the World Wide Net. He was heavily involved with 1970’s research on the Uniform Resource Locator (URL). Without his pivotal contribution to the invention of the forward slash character, websites would be a disorganized mess kept in one folder, and the World Wide Net as we know it today could not exist.

Kitty Ann Rubin

Kitty Ann Rubin

Kitty Ann Rubin — Kitty Ann to her friends — is a futurist specializing in putting together her special view of the people and events around her to develop ideas of what is to come. It’s not psychic — It’s science! The science of inductive reasoning. Taking the disparate and making sense of the world, so you can make plans for your brighter tomorrow!

Ross Wilson

Ross Wilson

Ross grew up on a commune, the son of a herb garden pioneer and a henna tattoo artist. He always felt an affinity for paints since getting his fingers into it when he was five. Encouraged to continue, he moved on to macrame, string art and mobiles, until his mind was entirely blown seeing The Beatles’ Yellow Submarine movie and the works of Peter Max. He’s high on life, and that’s all he’s sayin’.

Scholar 51

Scholar 51

Personal information redacted.

Who are we?

AskTheIdiots.Com is a satirical website that follows news and popular media to report on the latest crazy things in the world. It also has a host of fictional characters that write fictional advice and blogs. We advise against actually following that advice. Following an idiot’s advice, fictional or real, is a good way to get yourself hurt or imprisoned or your reputation permanently dirtied.

Note that all correspondence with Ask The Idiots and content thereof becomes the property of Ask The Idiots to do with as we see fit. This mainly includes reposting on the website, however the contents of the correspondence will never be edited or altered except for names and places that could identify the author. (If you wish to allow us to use your name or chosen alias, that’s fine, but we’ll never list your location.)