Fall is here and the air is cooler. We need someone to warm our virtual dunce chair for a week. So, it’s time to vote for Idiot of the Week for October 20, 2014! Besides being featured prominently on our homepage, the winner will eventually get an award certificate to download and print, suitable for framing and stapling to their foreheads. (Or hanging on the wall. Whatever.) Below the poll are the usual links to why these filbert-brained nominees are qualified. Winner posted Monday!
The Candidates for October 20, 2014
Luis Rodriguez-Neri: Do the Dew! And do the time! Señor Rodriguez-Neri was arrested when officers found him in the car he had smashed into a lightpole. He admitted to drinking six shots of Bacardi but refused to take the sobriety tests. Then, at the station, he attempted to bribe the officers with Mountain Dew. Maybe he should have tried offering the rum.
David Cavell: Cavell attempted to buy a merman outfit for a charity swim meet, but accidentally bought a rubber S&M gimp suit. Luckily his daughter told him what it was and his wife was able to alter it into something more merman-like, although swimming around fully wrapped in latex and a zipper mask would have been interesting.
Freedom Socialist Party of Seattle, Washington: The FSP has been pushing for a $20/hour minimum wage for quite some time. So, when they posted job listings for Web Content Manager, they obviously offered that as the wage, right? Nope. They’re offering $13/hour and part time, thereby cutting out the need to pay for insurance or anything else. Maybe they are doing it ironically.
Principal Gary Stamper: When you tell students to come to Spirit Week dressed as celebrities, and a couple guys decide to dress up like women, it’s probably a good idea to let them be. Stamper didn’t. He sent two teens home and the next day half the school showed up dressed as the opposite gender in protest. Congratulations, Principal Stamper! You taught a valuable lesson to students on how to combat idiocy.