Last week we had no supreme idiot. Things got busy for the idiots running ATI, and we just couldn’t get to the office that weekend. Or the tent. Whatever we’re shacked up in at the moment. This week, though, we have some possibly great kings or queens of lunacy. It’s time to vote for Idiot of the Week for November 10, 2014! The winner will eventually get an award certificate to download and print, suitable for framing or providing several paper cuts. Until we get that certificate designed, they will get to sit in our virtual dunce chair on our home page. Below the poll are the usual links to why these biscuit-brained nominees are qualified. Winner posted Monday!
The Candidates for November 10, 2014
The City of Fort Lauderdale, Florida: We may have to make a new rule about Florida, because they end up in our polls a bit too often. This time, Fort Lauderdale had two ministers arrested for feeding the homeless. Granted there is a law there saying you can’t feed homeless people in public, but apparently one of these ministers fought a similar law in 1999 and won the case. You’d think Fort Lauderdale would get a clue. Besides, it just looks bad to be shackling 90-year-old men who are helping others.
Sylvia Mashiah: Sylvia “Wrong Way” Mashiah had 27 pounds of methamphetamine stowed away in the rear panels of her car. When she was waved through the customs checkpoint, she thought she was home free! But she took a wrong turn and ended up in the parking lot where the secondary searches of suspicious vehicles takes place, and agents found the drugs. She’ll have a minimum five years in prison to learn her right from her left.
Heather Cagle: Stuffing kids in car trunks seems to be a thing now. Cagle, an Oklahoma teacher, decided she needed to make a Wal-Mart run. She knew leaving her kids in the classroom unsupervised was probably a bad idea, so she piled them all in the car. Two wouldn’t fit, so she put them in the trunk. We understand. Sometimes those everyday low prices on snacks are just too good to pass up.
Epila Cosmetics: A Turkish cosmetics company needed a photo of a hairy guy to market its line of hair removal products. It found one online and slapped it in an advertisement that hit the papers across Turkey. Somehow they missed the fact it was a post-capture photo of al Qaeda’s Khalid Sheik Mohammed. Whether the company is truly ignorant or just made a bad marketing move, Epila makes it to our nominees this week!