Q: Is there any right thing to wear to the gym?

Q: Is there any right thing to wear to the gym?

A: First, I wish to commend you for your willingness to go to a gym. Finding the motivation to reach for, say this bag of cheese puffs, is a lot easier than getting up to go to the gym, or anywhere really. That being said, there are some common sense rules for gym attire.

Loose, but supportive is the goal. You need to wear something that is loose enough to allow for plenty of movement and flailing about, but not so loose that you are showing inappropriate bits to the other fitness masochists. The tricky part is keeping it loose while maintaining support for all your dangling bits. Men and women both have parts that if caught in a weight machine would be considerably more painful than a pinch. These delicate parts need to be contained in a way that keeps them out of danger. I have never quite figured out the right balance myself. There has been many a time that the stares of the other gym goers have informed me that the “ole pride and joy” had made an appearance.

PRO TIP
It has been suggested that perhaps I should recommend a jock strap or sports bra, depending on your gender. Personally, I find these articles of clothing to be extremely uncomfortable. They are particularly binding for those who are “big boned” and, in an emergency, can be difficult to disengage. (This led to my second most embarassing gym experience.) Your mileage may vary, especially if you are double-jointed.

The next thing to consider is the material of your outfit. Your clothing should be absorbent. Working out usually causes a great deal of perspiration. Heck, I’ve barely typed out two paragraphs and I’m sweating so much it looks like I’ve just stepped out of the shower! Leaving puddles of sweat on the gym equipment will not endear you to the other fitness-minded people.

Finally, wear loud, vibrant colors. In most places loud colors would be a distraction, but in a gym it is the dull, plain colors that stand out. I don’t know if working out causes the eyes to stop processing colors properly, or if the endorphins just stun the brain so much that good taste is no longer an option, but loud, clashing color combinations are a must if you wish to blend in.

Those are the common sense rules for what to wear to the gym. Now, you can avoid having to be concerned with all of that by working out at home. Then you can wear whatever you want. I spend most of my time in a t-shirt and a pair of tighty-whiteys. Of course, I don’t get a lot of exercise done, but there is always a trade-off for these compromises. I just heard my mother’s nurse leave, so I should probably go see how we are doing in regards to her favorite beverage. Until next time, stay motivated, or something…

Author Description

Fitness Bob

Fitness Bob’s resume reads like a guide to the top fitness chains in the United States, totaling nearly 100 hours of personal instruction to Hollywood greats and normal health seekers alike. Knowing his ideas were far ahead of those chains’ ideals, he now works from his own equipment in the family home. His busy schedule doesn’t allow much time for his own workouts, but he will take a few moments to pass on his knowledge to you.

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