A: Call the authorities! This should be classified as an act of domestic terrorism, or even international terrorism depending on what you do for a living. I know I am a monster if I don’t get my morning coffee before having to deal with the rest of the population. I can’t think straight, I feel awful, and I just generally hate the entire world until that smooth warm liquid is racing through my veins. Now, imagine someone feeling like that who happens to be a bus driver, or a policeman, or a pilot! A lot of people could end up injured, or worse! By stealing a person’s coffee they may have, intentionally, started a chain reaction that has the potential to be the worst disaster in known history! So, again, call the authorities! Start an immediate investigation and get that reckless, evil coffee bandit off the streets before someone gets killed!
